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Heretic States (ep​/​mixtape)

by Phil Forsyth

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    Home dubbed. Repurposed "jewel" cases. May or may not be recorded over thrift store finds.

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1.
Patriot 01:04
We had one job, elect some candidates into he offices Well, I guess it's true we didn't get a whole lot in the way of choices But don't pretend you flipped a coin, you did decide that it was you or me And the people that I love, scrape their bodies off into the sea This burning house is still my home, I guess there's hotter places to be "free" But if you're at war with your neighbors, then you're not a patriot Well I repeat, you fight for your rights to kill but you do not care what happens to me You only care about the embryonic or illiterate locally And talk a good game on Sunday, and they pat you on the back for a fee Star spangled banner in the backyard, but a different flag above the t.v. Some brittle links in the chain, you got dissenters in the family 'Cause if you're a bad neighbor then you're not a patriot
2.
Down 02:06
Well give me the drugs... To cure my age Give me your love… To fill this page Tell me what you want from me I’ll erase it What toxic numbing elixir do you bleed? I’ll drink it down Well, give me some sugar… I’ll take my medicine Give me your claws… I’ll bear my teeth again Tell me the laws… The definition of sin Knowledge of good and evil in the Garden of Eden The juiciest pomegranate Branded “Heaven”, won’t you promise me heaven? I’ll taste it But don’t you water it down, your snake is content to drown In debasement Rewards silver, gold, and bronze in the Olympian dawns Pressure crushing hours to diamonds Age giving birth to new age, witchcraft, thyme, parsley, and sage A passion burning our forest down And I feel fine
3.
You’re a monstrous man I know my teacher like I know my left hand Up right and down, we traveled all over town But couldn’t find no place to land And I’m still hungry ‘cause I’m new Starving for anything, but what’s it to you? You’re a dragon sittin’ on what would be my things Maybe I sound a little drunk That’s just the song of some depressed couch punk Rentin’ space nobody else takes up Sorry to use up all your air In your America that went somewhere Just longing for the days we were not visible and It looked like you bet on the bigger dog And there’s a lot of us More than you thought there was And now you’re eyeing us like we just might jump you Well more or less honorous, we Spit, curse, and fuck and cuss Fighting for a new day without you much on our minds at all You know that’s more or less a lie Wishful thinking, maybe Just to sleep at night Wherever one may chance to lie my little head And no, I know I’m not dead Like I said I’d be Well, the space some take up in my head Evicts better parts of me
4.
One day the fuckers took the flag And then it meant something else We had some skills and some plans They had some different plans Now All we have is anger All we have is anger now All we have is anger All we have is anger now We were proud, did we have pride? We didn’t dig this pit of shame, we didn’t Not proud enough to keep it up Or through with us, we simply through with it Now All we have is anger All we have is anger now All that’s left is anger All that’s left is anger now The fuckers took away the living wage Blew up what would inflate too Well, look who’s got the marbles now That no one wants to play with you Now All we have is anger All we have is anger now Now All we have is anger Yeah, all we have is anger now
5.
A generation down a well Which well’s a little hard to say The mayor says he’s giving up And truth be told, we never gave a fuck We’d really like to find you now We’d really love to find but look who lost the faith We’d really like to help you now We’d really like to find but look who lost the faith
6.
Well yeah I had a bad day, I don’t wanna talk about it If you convince me that I’ve been wronged, then I’m complicit in the violence And I am juggling enough realities without the weight of this one Right and wrong fuck off, because I gotta feed the baby And I take comfort in the chaos, knowing none of this was anybody’s plan My friend Tommen fought a war and most things, he don’t remember But some things you don’t forget, he thinks about some more than others Like a sixteen year old kid holding his guts in while the mortars Sure do make an awful din, an anthem celebrating borders Tommen curses God in jest, bemoaning that this was all “somebody’s plan” Tommen says it must be comforting to blame God or the devil But he’s seen evil up close and he says, “Make no bones about it It’s pride, cruelty, and greed that keeps exclusion profits growing Populating dehumanization camps with villains of the week Serialized twenty-four hours on all our favorite scary horror shows” He holds the cross his wife once wore and tells her that he’s sorry That he didn’t kiss her more and wasn’t better than his father And I take solace in the notion that all this means something to him Even thinking that there’s nothing for him not the other side Tommen falls asleep and looks at peace, watching those horror shows And I can’t help but thinking it’s alright if none of this was anybody’s plan And I sleep well ‘bout every other night ‘cause I’m alright and I have made some plans
7.
A Baptism 03:26
Sundays I never felt like singing “hallelujah” It means so little when the blood of Christ don’t seem to run red through ya But if the winkin’ angel down the pew doubts too, well honey, how would you know? But how sweet it is to be baptized in a light of your own OG country and western songs nourished me from the start Old Jim said the rest was just noise, but I figured some of it was art Looted the ruins of gospel too when I was lost there in the dark Now how holy it is to be baptized in a light of my own Father Jude frowned hard when I suggested God was bitter in the days of old How do you read the character of the creator in the testament as anything but cold? And then I realized he’d dedicated his life to a god that lived in just his eye And how warm it is to be baptized in a light of one’s own
8.
Never thought I'd live so well Cowering in a tiny shell With a front row seat in hell Writhing from the pain Every piece of me, inert Making me an introvert Why must waiting have to hurt? Spiral down the drain Sun up, sun down Open eyes, see no hope Breathe in, breathe out Same old air, not a change When will something start? Used to have a stratagem Now I have no plans to hem Zombies have more life in them I just need a save Feel the light in blinding haze When your head has spun for days And your courage dumbly strays How can I be brave? Lights on, lights off Days go by without pause Sit up, lie down Nothing thrills, seconds freeze When will the pain leave? I touch, senseless I think, empty I scream, silence I cry And cry And cry and cry and cry Not a stirring from within Like a living mannequin How can you say that I win Like I'm better men? I guess I'll just have to wait Stewing in my poison hate Close my eyes and lock the gate Asking myself, 'when?'
9.
The Hellfire 02:34
Tell me the truth, what's keeping you honest if your only motivator is the other shoe What's the point of making up a bunch of rules if you need a divine guard to stop you Some sins are sins to some but not all and who are you to make the call Then there's just hurtin' people hurting people When they wanna, do you wanna, what's to stop you? Do I wanna? Well, no If the only reason to be good's the hellfire How do you learn to love another Don't fear make you a liar What kind of father loves with threats and asks you to be a martyr Cult thought's religion these days, how's any of this a self starter Well can I get an amen Amen, hallelujah, amen If your man tells you it's simple when it's complicated That's a lie so obvious it'd drive the honest insane If y'all really need your own reality to wash the harsh of life down, I suppose I do have pity But if you let the pulpit demonize your children, tell you get your voice and name into the ring on just one thing Then anybody claims to be the messiah of your party cooks every meal For the next few hundred weeks If the only reason to be good's the hellfire How do you learn to love another Don't fear make you a liar What kind of father loves with threats and asks you to be a martyr Cult thought's religion these days, how's any of this a self starter Yeah, well can I get an amen Amen, hallelujah well, amen…
10.
A connoisseur of silence, I lived in the city and the country and the noise is about the same Gunshots, barking dogs, and industrial machines building or reaping just about anywhere you go Sirens blur to white noise if you stay stationary long enough o lose all sound in the pouring rain Given the right night, hooting wildlife paired with sound of crickets in mass can be deafening I kinda like it when it’s all messed up and the thought of control is just not a thing The processes of adaptation when you’re forced out into the world can be a painful therapy Like when the shy get on stage and sing from the heart of agoraphobic tendencies Or when someone with a fear of drowning gets up the nerve to sign up for scuba diving It is with this in mind I live in a country full of bullies like those in my infancy Inocculating myself to the sheer ass-holery of narcissists who pretend that they can’t see An invented divide between the born in languish culture and the silver spooned born into such luxury Denying every advantage of the fortunate ones who dare to claim money can’t solve anything While spending more than some small countries on a propaganda war with the suffering Brainwashing those inclined to brainwashing control from the sociable reinforcement of a philosophy Built on the comfort of a dream evolved from an acute awareness of the end of things While I can get my head around it, I still have to live with others who insist it’s a post credits scene I don’t mean to judge harsh the understanding of a species in transition to bigger things Than an extinction level event some seem content to egg on like it’s a game of chicken If there’s a way to capitalize on the ignorance of the easily swayed, they’ll do it So unavoidable, the fading of the generations supporting it will one day undo it

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released January 2, 2023

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Phil Forsyth St. Petersburg, Florida

Phil Forsyth is a seasoned punk rocker and songsmith living in Saint Petersburg, Florida with his wife, a tortoise, three very odd cats, and a few who hang around.

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